Two Fears In Weight-loss: A Healthcoach Viewpoint

I was out shopping today grabbing a few items and noticed the aisle of Halloween supplies, decorations, what you didn’t know you needed in your life to celebrate this holiday all glaring at me. As I strolled down the aisle of horror, it got me to thinking about fears. Then that got me to thinking about fears focused specifically on loosing weight, the causes – the root to it all.  What makes for a fear when it comes to loosing weight and how do those fears show up and affect the process?  Well, each one serves a different purpose, highlighting an area of personal struggle and a need for growth and change in that area.   

For me there are two main fears that helped me carry and encourage the weight along.  Although I am at a different point in my health and weight loss journey where these fears no longer serve me or control me for that matter, they were a part of the process that I had to acknowledge in order to shift to a new me and a new set of standards for living for MY best ME.  These were legit fears that provided me the justification of caring the weight around. 

Fear #1: Unwanted attention will rear it’s ugly head.

When talking about fears we have to take a step back and figure out the why we are on this journey.  The why of what the weight represents that you just don’t want to have to deal with, the what we are avoiding!  For me the main reason that I allowed myself to put the weight on was a shield from unwanted male attention.  I thought that by putting my shield of weight on that it would make it all stop.  Well, I did that and when I say it was no shield, just a magnet for attracting other issues, locking on for a ride.     

This is a hard fear to overcome when it comes to the unwanted attention of other people.  I have been able to shift my views on not allowing the words of other people to keep me from embracing my womaness.  Yes I know that it is ridiculously hard to not feel some days overwhelmingly beat down by the unwanted comments and attention of others.  But here’s the thing, NEVER sacrifice your own physical happiness it will never be worth it and it directly affects your mental happiness too. 

Yes the shield provides a sense of comfort but it causes more harm than it does good in the long run.  The harm being the extra weight that you are carrying around that causes physical harm to your body, your joints, bones and muscles.  That very shield that we are allowing to protect us also does that, keeps out all things both good and not so good, but with that it can keep out the goodness that we need to let in too.      

The one thing that I have learned is that you can’t control other people you can only control yourself.   Yes some humans are simply a** holes and think they can say, touch, shame, or guilt you in sexual ways.  Remember that you are not at fault for their lack of respect for another human being. 

I know how hard it is to process through these emotions and will not attempt to say that it is easy to get over.  What I have learned is that I control only me, and you have to be realistic with how people are that you wish or want to be different.  If I know that going to certain places will make me uncomfortable I avoid them.  What is the point of putting myself in a position like that?  Yes it may be seemingly inconvenient to avoid places, but the alternative is not something that I am willing to chance.  I love myself far too much for avoidable hardship that may dull my ability to sparkle. 

What is important here is that you show up in this world as your best self.  Not a self that has allowed a shield to be built, all be it as a means of protection, but at what cost to your authentic YOUNESS?  By living as your best self you  tap into that light that only we can shine that may help others during periods of darkness to realize that they are not alone in this fight for living life.  I face this fear head on by remembering that I deserve only happiness, love and peace in my life, and determined to show up in this world as my best self fighting like hell to do just that.

Fear #2: I won’t be able to eat what I want to

This is one of the main reasons why people all over the world carry extra weight around!  You see we have to look at food as not a means of comfort, because when it enters into that realm it becomes a extremely toxic and an unhealthy relationship.  When we allow ourselves to latch on to things that are not healthy for our bodies, we have entered the danger zone of addiction by means of food. 

Food addiction as a means of coping can be a hard addiction to overcome for some.  It is complex by nature starting with the simple fact that we need food, we have to eat in order to survive and learning to have the self control can be challenging.  For me personally I had to take a step back and look at it as not being kind to myself.  I was being extremely cruel, abusive and mean to myself through the foods that I was allowing myself to eat.  Foods that tasted good but caused internal inflammation, strained my heart, stretched my skin revealing tears in the skin a.k.a. stretch marks, added pressure to my joints, achyness and pain, with the reflection in the mirror causing at times debilitating mental suffering. 

I had allowed my own self to be abusive in a similar manner that I was attempting to protect myself from to begin with!  When you don’t even require your own self to respect YOURSELF you can’t expect others to do the same.  We are the ones that create the instruction and care manual, that is reflected in how we treat ourselves.  When I finally realized this and forgave myself for the mistreatment of my own self, only then was I able to change my instruction and care manual.  I rewrote the manual from a loving place that set new requirements that have changed the food that I eat to be kind and loving to my body in how it is grown and harvested and prepared.  

So you see I can eat whatever I want because I have set a new requirement for how I eat and if it does not align with that then it does not get eaten!  The same can be true for you and it starts by looking at beyond the simple act of eating. Towards a bigger picture vision of how it affects you after you eat it and your body processes it for what it needs to thrive and not just survive.  You become what you feed yourself, so be aware of the quality and standard that it falls into or is.    

There you have my two fears that I had allowed to keep me in a position of being overweight and beyond unhappy physically and emotionally.  With all the fear that I allowed to keep me or carried with me as one point in my journey, I can honestly say that they just do not scare me enough to keep from being happy.  I deserve nothing but love and goodness and it starts by requiring those very same things of myself that I also require of others.  Remember this, that all fears do is keep us from being our best selves!

Much Love, Nic

Do you need help embracing the realness of YOU and what you want that to be?   Schedule a free one-on -one consultation with me to help figure this out together–>📧

Are You Living Two Faced

Are you two faced? The person that is trying really hard to be someone or something that they are not. There is no possible way that you are happy living the life designed to be the life of someone else. I am a believer that we are meant to be who we are, you know why fit in when you are meant to stand out.

We were designed for a specific purpose tailored to the unique individuals that each of us are intended to be. With that being the truth, then why would you want to wear another face when you were meant to rock the face that you were born with, why change it to look like someone else. You see your face may have been designed to inspire others to embrace their own faces enjoying the distinct features that only they have that can not be taken away by anyone else!

Embrace your unique face, don’t be two faced anymore, this great Sunday of ours. Take that face and work on working towards that greatness that only your face is meant to do, experience, pass on or take in. Stop looking at others and trying to change your face to look like theirs, love you for being you. There was no mistake so why are you trying to fix what is not even broken which was designed with such perfection. Repeat after me, My imperfections are what make me perfect, repeat every single day until you get it and you are whole faced again.

Much Love,

Nic ❤️

Do you need help with making changes to your skin and body health but not sure where to start or how to?  Schedule a one on one session with me–> 💌

5 Struggles I Had Going Keto As A Vegetarian

Hello, loves! With the start of a new year, well people are all about eating right and this and that. A couple of month back I tried the whole “Keto Diet”. As soon as I did I learned a lot in an instant and thought I would share my eating experience, from a vegetarian stand point. This was a lesson in bio-individuality. What works for one person just may not work for the other. I was the other here in this scenario.

#1 It Sucks If You Don’t Like Coconut

As a person that does not like coconut at all, man the struggle was real, like beyond real! Let’s just say that I was not a happy camper with the whole coconut this and that. They are powerful supplements in the ketoverse, but in my land, in my world, it was a yuck, I do not and can not eat it, and yup I am still hungry! Yes you can find other ways around it, but it took ways around it, which took additional planning. Also see #4 adding to the stress on top of not liking coconut.

#2 Headaches and Muscleaches Ain’t My Jam

OMG, when I say that I had the worst headache for 3 days straight starting out and was achy all over! I was miserable to the point that it was affecting my sleep and just being able to walk comfortably. How can this be something good for my body to go through was my instant thought. So, diving deeper to figure out what the hell to do about it. I tired several things and realized the cause of my headaches and overall achyness, causing me to be a grumpy person all day long! My electrolytes were out of wack, in other words I was suffering from the keto flu. I added in a cup of water with a pinch of himilayan sea salt three times throughout the day. Man did it make my headache slowly fade away and my muscles less achy. I was starting to feel normal, well not like crap!

#3 Poop Be Gone

Now I am that person that is completely comfortable talking about poop. I will have no problem asking did you poop today and celebrating if you did or figuring out an action plan to get things moving. So it goes without saying that the whole not pooping everyday while on keto, well I just did not know how to feel about it. Everything that I saw said that this was normal, and that you may need to supplement with psyllium husk, or other keto friendly fiber supplements. WHYYYYYYY, when I can just eat something that has fiber in it naturally, like an apple or even oatmeal! So needless to say, Nic Love was not a happy camper about the lack of natural fiber and being encouraged to take a supplement. This right here made me become such a brat. I like to eat real food and really do feel that food is meant to heal, when eaten appropriately for your bodies needs, but I digress…I guess.

#4 Vegetarian and Keto Are Not The Best Of Friends In My World

As a vegetarian I have come to embrace that if I want to eat real food that tastes good and good for me then, to the kitchen I must go! The keto way to eat requires a lot of planning and it was exhausting! I really had to have an action plan, especially not eating meat and not eating processed food. That meant that I had to cook every single thing that I wanted to eat and pay close attention to my macros, protein specifically. With my protein macro, required special attention, since I was used to eating non-keto friendly plant based protein sources such as legumes. The recommended keto friendly source is soy based, which for me I have a slight sensitivity in excess. This made it unnecessarily hard, and I just do not feel that eating should be a complicated process.

#5 Working Out Just Never Got Easy

I have heard many a person say that you just have to get past a certain point to allow your body to adjust. That never happened to me to the point that I felt ok while working out. I love to do HIIT workouts, and while doing keto, I could barely do a yoga session that was nothing more than relaxation and stretching focused. The only type of working out I could do was walking. As a person with limited time during the week, walking was not going to cut it from a fitness standpoint and the amount of time I had available for fitness.

So those are my five struggles that I experienced doing keto. Do I think this is a horrible diet that is a waste of time? No, not at all! It is a great way to allow your body the time to do a resetting of sorts. For me, and my body and lifestyle it was just too hard of a diet to follow. I did learn some great things about the diet, and can see how it can be a lasting way of eating for some, but me it just was not a good fit long term. Thank you Keto Diet, for the three months of memories…

Much Love, Nic 💗

Do you need help with making changes to your skin and body health but not sure where to start or how to?  Schedule a one on one session with me–> 💌

How To Do Better For Lasting Change

Hi Loves! In last weeks post I shared that I’m focused on doing better than I did yesterday. My own little way of leveling up each day, with small little mindfulness shifts towards doing what I want to do better in. The instant question that pops up is, well how do I do that? Here are just a few to get the brain thinking and moving a bit, with what may work for your specific life goals.

Skin With Love

If your goal is to clear your skin or create a skin care routine, start by just washing your face. Seems simple, but if you aren’t washing your face every night, just doing it some times or not at all, well that’s a great place to start. Doing this simple action every day, will build over time to a full grown habit. The key to skin care and getting great skin is all about consistency, that is instantly seen for years to come, so keep at. This supports being able to say “wow my skin looks amazing”…goal achieved!

Living With Love

If your goal is that you want to improve your sleep, start with winding down 10 minutes by reading a book or magazine. Put down any electronic device, no more touching until the next day! This time of letting the brain calm and just chill is important in supporting more sound sleep. Reading forces you to focus on the words that you are reading, and you will find over time, the chatter that you may find pops up for you starting out starts to settle down. You can increase the time a little each day, and will notice that you will go right into sleep more easily and wake up much more refreshed.

Food With Love

If your goal is to eat healthier start with eating something green everyday. By adding in foods that you want to eat, that support a healthier eating pattern, they take up the space that you would normally be eating something that was not so healthy. It is the concept of Crowding Out! When you crowd out the space with good things, habits, and such you push out those things and not so great habits. The space becomes filled with, crowded out, with healthier foods and creates a healthier eating habit.

Fit With Love

If your goal is move more than start walking a bit after so much time goes by. If you don’t have a smart watch that vibrates your wrist with reminders to move every hour I will share what I have been doing for the past few months. I call it 90 on 15 off. I work for 90 minutes and then take a 15 minute break to get up, take a walk around and drink water. This helps me stay productive in a realistic timing in getting things done but also not getting caught up in getting things done. This timing really allows for that with the needed benefit of taking a step away and re-calibrating. I find I have more energy and focus afterwards and have gotten some much needed steps in!

Those are just a few, and I do mean a few, ideas on how to do better than the day before. This practice at its core is being mindful. Being mindful is taking the time to take a look at what you are doing and what you want to be doing and, well doing it. Cheers to a year of doing better each day towards doing better all together!

Much Love, Nic ❤️

Do you need help with making changes to your skin and body health but not sure where to start or how to?  Schedule a one on one session with me–> 💌

And We Start Again…

Hello Loves! Welcome to a new year, a new decade, a new day, to start again. This year my mantra is “do better than I did yesterday”. I wanted to really focus in on taking it day by day. Keeping it in sizable chunks, centered in the land of realistic goal setting.

With that, lets get real here! It is so overwhelming to think about what you need to accomplish over the next year towards smashing your goals. Yup I said it, and I know because it can feel a bit much to process and handle all the things we want to achieve and make changes to. So, going into my Health Coach mode, lets adjust the focus here, lets adjust for achievement. What if you were to just take it day by day? Focused on doing better than you did yesterday?

Well, I can say that I am confident by looking at things from that small little mind shift will lead to a better sense of accomplishment and commitment to the process. When we take things and put them into to more tangible actions it makes it, well less overwhelming. When we are not overwhelmed we are able to do such great and wonderful things. We are able to start.

This simple act of starting can cause so many people to stumble when the mind is thinking full picture mode. So take it down to brush strokes, that build to paint the bigger picture! And soon enough brush stroke after stroke, taking a step back to look at the progress made, a work of art has been created. So will you join me in committing to doing better than you did yesterday? Next week I’ll share how doing better each day looks in action.

Much Love, Nic ❤️

Do you need help with making changes to your skin and body health but not sure where to start or how to?  Schedule a one on one session with me–> 💌

See You Next Year…God Willing

Hello Loves! Sometimes in life you just have to take every single minute of the day and use it all up on yourself! So, off I go to do just that. I am trying to figure a few things out, health, personally, and professionally wise, to get to a place that I feel better about things that I can control. In order to have a better sense of the controlling capabilities that I have, I must take the time to just be and do me.

So I am taking the rest of this year to focus on my plan of action that I have come up with to tune in to me and tune out to the very chatty and noisy world around me. Since I am stepping away from my blog and offline socially, I want to wish everyone a Glorious Halloween, Happy Thanksgiving, a Merry Christmas, and cheers to close out of another year of life for the books!

Have you ever felt like you needed to take some time away from the online “world”? God willing I will be back online at the start of the New Year and the start of a new decade, sharing some exciting news of some sort. Remember this, that it is ok to step away to step into your life in a more connected way.

Much Love, Nic

Will Never Forget When She Told Me This

Hi my loves! Have you every been bullied by a teacher? I have, and it affected me in such a prolific way still till this day. With my blog being a space of lovingly living courageously I thought I would share my own story.

I always remember this teacher that I had that was beyond mean to me and made my life a living hell in elementary school for an entire school year.  She would pick on me in front of the class, comparing me to her favorite student, making me feel stupid, and at times worthless because I was not ever going to be like her fave student.  I remember I would think to myself, I REALLY didn’t want to be like her, she was stuck up, rude and couldn’t even multiply.  I just didn’t want to be ridiculed in front of the class, I just wanted to do my work and go home!

It wasn’t until the summer before my freshman year in high school when I ran into that teacher again that I was in for a shock.  She looked happy to see me…praised how smart I was and always knew that I was, for getting into the school that I was attending in the Fall and how I’d grown into such a stunning, beautiful young lady.  Pan to me, staring in complete shock thinking…what was I to make of these words, were these words what she really thought?  I had always remembered how cruel she was to me and those days I would go the bathroom and just cry my eyes out.  Was this the same teacher?  Being the polite southern girl that I was, I said thank you, forced a smile, and hide until she left.  

A few years later after that I found out that she had passed away from cancer. It was in this moment that my experience with her came into even more of a better perspective.  You do what you are experiencing. If you are unhappy with your appearance you will make other people unhappy with their appearance.  She was overweight and would always make comments about my appearance, and how I thought I was better than everyone else in front of the class.  

When life humbles us we can be kind with our words and attempt to right those wrongs that we have done to other people.  I was not aware but at the time I saw her that summer she had been battling cancer.  Humbled by her current experience, making amends for all those days of heart ache and sadness that she caused me.  Sharing kind words of encouragement that I so longed to hear back then, but can humbly say that I was able to experience years later, than not.  

I never wish hard moments on anyone, but as I stand here on the other side of many a moment of pain and bad experiences, I know how these many things serves us to make us stronger and give us perspective on being better humans.  I never want to make anyone feel how I felt that entire school year in elementary, but feel only the goodness of kind words that summer before the start of high school.  It is that memory, among many others, that guides me to be kind to others.  It is that memory that also allows me the compassion to see people for more than the words that they may share, if only from a place of pain.

Much Love, Nic

Do you need help with making changes to your skin and body health but not sure where to start or how to?  Schedule a one on one session with me–> 💌

Where You Are Is Good

Happy Friday loves! How has your day, week, been for you? Have you been feeling anything other than yes, today was an amazing day? Get real and be real, that’s how you start acknowledging how you want things to be different than they are. There is always hope for something new and different!

Sometimes life can be and feel overwhelming that when we want to make things better or change things we just don’t know how.  We can become confused or simply feel stuck with just the thought of trying to figure out what direction or move to make to move things in a better direction.  We may think that we have to have something or accomplish this or that before we can begin to make that change.  Lean, in let me whisper something in your ear…you have to start somewhere and there is no better place to start then where you stand. 

Yup, all you can do is be how you are right now and in order to make that something different you must start right there as you exist. I have found that starting at YOUR starting line, can help things seem a little less daunting when you turn in and tune in to where YOU are.  Focus on what can be accomplished from where you are and put things into action.  Once you are in action things will move you in the direction that you need to go in. Obstacles that were once there will disappear or appear not as obstacles but simply stepping stones.

Take the first steps from where you are today, this Friday!  Focus on what you can do from where you are.  There is always something that can be done right where you are, just focus on that.  Concentrate on the smaller things and tackle those, especially if the bigger picture seems daunting.  So start where you are and what you can do to move you to where you want to be.   

Much Love, Nic

Do you need help with making changes to your skin and body health but not sure where to start or how to?  Schedule a one on one session with me–> 💌

Ice Cream Trucking

Hello, loves! How is life treating you since the last time we came together here? As an adult who is faced with the ridiculous requirement by society to adult, I miss being able to just be a kid again.  Also, still not sure anyone has this adulting thing figured out but I digress.

Sigh, to be a kid again, the days of just trying to have the best day ever!  Riding bikes days on end, avoiding the bully zone with your team of kids there to help you navigate the lay of the kidscape.  Chasing down the sound of the ice cream truck music for that sweet reward of locating the target feeding your belly with the coolness of sweet satisfaction.  Hanging out during recess with other kids in school who wanted nothing but good things for me.   Knowing that it was all about having fun, playing to our hearts content.  Kids would ask you to play not thinking about if you vibed or had the cool this or that.  No, it was just focused on getting your play on coexisting in the neighborhood or playground together as long as you didn’t affect there good times, no issues would pop off for the need to run and tell your mama or visit the principles office.  

Now, as a person attempting with all the best of my ability to be an adult, I understand why so many “adults” have a hard time dealing with other people attempting the adulting process.  The adult landscape is a hard one to navigate when there are unsaid laws of the land and vary by your current longitude and latitude coordinates.  It can become overwhelming to say the least to try to figure out this whole new world of “adulting”.  It can seem like a lonely road to walk alone with all these battles to fight solo, with no time to play, no that’s NOT allowed in Adulthood.

Responsibility…blah blah blah blah, this bill…blah blah blah, food and shelter…blah blah blah, other adults…blah blah blah.  It is so overwhelming to try to keep it all balanced as an adult and trying to engage with other adulting people who are on the same road as you.  Some have become jaded, worn out, abused, and disheartening from walking the road of life.  They engage with others based on their experiences through unkindness, harsh criticism, hate, if only to feel like they can better understand others because they are trying to bring them to the level that they are at.  We are forced to grow up, to have it figured out, with expectations of how your truth for you should look like based on societal standards and comfortability.  We have forgotten about how it was to be a kid, just focused on having the best day ever, sharing that day with others with no concern if the other is like us beyond being a human being,  with the focus only on enjoying the moment.   

So I ask you a simple question, do you want to swing on the swings with me…I’ll push you higher if you push me high, slide down the slide…thanks for letting me go first, play jump rope sharing the one…you jump while I cheer you on.  Oh and run like hell making sure I am running right next to you listening to that music in the distance where I’ll see you at the ice cream truck when we for a brief moment most definitely have something in common, liking and now eating ice cream at the same time together.  Too bad that we can’t think about the bigger connections as adults beyond ice cream, or sorbet for those vegan and lactose intolerant peeps, cause everyone is welcome at the ice cream truck.

With Love, Nic

Do you need help with making changes to your skin and body health but not sure where to start or how to?  Schedule a one on one session with me–> 💌

Zesty Avocado Cucumber Salad

Hello loves, and happy summer! We are in full on summer, officially anyway, and the foods that we need start to shift to help with the heat and humidity that makes summer, summer. I created this salad months ago when it started to warm up and am now addicted to it. When I say this is my new face summer salad…well THIS is my new summer salad! It is zesty, refreshing, and it just tastes good.

What Ya Need

2 Avocados Large Ripe Rough Chopped

1 Cucumber sliced in rounds (not too thick, but can slice as thin liked)

1/2 red onion sliced thinly in rounds


1/4 cup Lemon Juice

1/2 cup avocado oil

2-3 TBS fresh chopped dill

2-3 cloves minced garlic (depends how garlicky you want it to be)

Salt and Pepper to taste (you want to be heavy on the salt because the cucumbers will release water while sitting)

What Ya Do

  • Add the lemon juice, dill (start with small amount and increase based on taste needs), and garlic, to a small glass bowl.
  • Using a wire whisk add in the avocado oil and whisk to emulsify the oil with the lemon juice.
  • Season with salt and pepper heavily as the cucumbers will release additional water so you want to be sure that the dressing will not be diluted down.
  • Taste dressing for a slight saltiness and if it is zesty enough.
  • In another bowl add the cucumbers and red onion, toss to combine.
  • Add in the cubed ripe avocado and add some of the dressing.
  • Toss to combine adding more of the dressing as needed.
  • For the best flavor impact let sit in the fridge for at least 4 hours or even overnight. The onions and cucumbers will become translucent.
  • Taste before serving to see if additional salt and pepper are needed.
  • Enjoy this refreshing salad.

Hope you enjoy the summer and remember to keep hydrated with water, as well as through the foods that you eat, and be sure to protect your skin from the sun as much as possible, through SPF or protective clothing!

Much Love, Nic

Do you need help with making changes to your skin and body health but not sure where to start or how to?  Schedule a one on one session with me–> 💌